Rantings of a Black Polemicist

Getting Game

Monday, November 22nd, 2004 | Personal

Having game is a bigger part of being a consultant than I thought.

I do IT consulting for a nameless Fortune 500 company. During my interview for the gig, the project lead saw my management and design experience and told me I’d be a perfect fit for the Lead Architect/Senior Developer role they were looking to fill.

He was gaming me. The little bastard told me what I wanted to hear so I’d accept the contract. It took a few clashes with the head goons for me to realize that my responsibilities didn’t go beyond the “ordinary workhorse consultant” role. He left for a position at another company 3 weeks later.

Because this small company has been acquired by the big company, the software applications have to be overhauled to work in a completely different environment. Big Company is mandating that best practices be used where Small Company used a bunch of improvised duct-tape fixes. Oh, and we’ve got to learn a completely different application server technology, design, code, test and implement all changes by Christmas.

It’s an enormous undertaking and management is clueless. I drove myself nuts in the beginning of the project, trying to steer my managers clear of pitfalls and help them accomplish their objectives. They didn’t get it. They were also annoyed with me telling them how to do their jobs.

My boss talked to me privately after I became visibly upset during another meeting. You see, management’s only solution to meeting deadlines is adding more people to a task or project, even if this requires more time and effort because it complicates things. “This isn’t rocket science,” he told me. “This just takes time, that’s all.” He honestly believes that developing enterprise applications is like sweeping a big warehouse floor. Double the people, cut the time in half, right? I asked him if a woman could carry a baby to term in only 1 month if 8 additional people were put on the task. He wasn’t amused.

Soon afterward I realized something profound: management only understands what they can see. I wasn’t getting credit for the work I was doing behind the scenes. I stopped pulling an incompetent consultant’s weight and he was fired less than 2 weeks later. I stopped trying to put out fires before management saw them. I stopped playing “teacher” to other full-time employees and consultants and let them figure out stuff on their own.

I started looking pretty damn good all of a sudden. I stopped working 9 1/2 hour days. I started taking long lunches and reading the news 50% of the day. I was completing tasks ahead of schedule while everyone else was struggling to keep their heads above water.

You see, I get paid hourly. There aren’t any bonuses if we complete the project on time. I’m not going to get promoted to management if I show strong leadership. Hell, if the project runs long my contract gets extended. I’m not going to hold these goons’ hands and teach them how to do my job just so they can boot me out without gaining a true appreciation for what goes into this.

Now I get it. Consulting is 50% skill and 50% game.

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